Fantasy and exploration are a healthy part of every aspect of life. The same holds true with in the boundaries of our sexuality. People are always curious on how Pete & I developed the ability to have such an open and honest dialogue.
The short answer is communication. It’s not something that happened overnight, and for us, was a very organic process that took place over a long period of time. It was deeper and deeper levels of trust, and deeper levels of sharing, always taking in a bit of information, and then taking the time needed to digest and understand the information given us.
Maybe the hardest part was being able to listen to concepts that flew in the face of everything that I had been taught about men and relationships, and learn to open my ears and thoughts, and understand what I was being told. Yes, there were things hard to hear, or things that took a very long time to understand.
And through it all, I learned that the journey, not the destination was the true success. Even if you never reach the goal, but have learned to communicate with your partner on a different level, you are much further along than most people.
There are many possibilities for exploration, including swinging, BDSM, role play, fetish and more. What they have in common is the need to respect your partner, take things slow, and enjoy the ability to share your fantasies with your partner.
December 10, 2008 at 5:36 am
There’s a really funny chapter in Harmon Leon’s new book on swingers. The book is called, The American Dream. In the book he sets out to live the American Dream by walking in many different subculture’s shoes, such as pot farmers, carnies, bible-bangers, arms dealers. But the best chapter is the one on swingers. I’d highly recommend reading the book.
You can check it out here on Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1568583524/ref=s9sdps_c1_14_at3-rfc_g1-frt_p-3237_g1_si5?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-4&pf_rd_r=1X0GP1GB43T54XPWSPRD&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=463383411&pf_rd_i=507846